Thursday, December 9, 2010

Emotional. Uncertain. Striving for the Best.

Emotional. That is what I would label today as. Everything that is good and pleasant makes me teary-eyed. I was comforted that when I asked one of my girls how she was doing, she replied, "emotional." Then I went and asked a friend the same question, she replied, "emotional."

I am grateful for my emotions, I love the fact that God made me sensitive to the things he loves and hates. I consider it a blessing to have an emotionally sensitive day. :)

I also was comforted while reading a blog I stalk. That's right, I am a blog stalker. Someone else was thinking the same things I am feeling two years ago! I thought that was so cool!

Uncertainty and striving for the best are the words that I am choosing to describe my next month or so. I get asked every single day what I want to do with my degree. I always respond, oh something in Marketing or PR and photography on the side. Everyday, the time gets closer to where I will actually be sending resumes out; in fact, I think I am going to next week! EEEK! As I was talking with the career counselor, a woman who has become a good friend of mine, I shared with her this silly guilt that I have; I don't want to apply to more than one place at a time because I feel I am being deceiving. :( I KNOW this is dumb, anyone who is hiring knows that if they have your resume so do a bunch of other people AND I'm never going to find a job if I do this one at a time! But, I can't help but feeling a little weird about it.

Then I have this uncertainty feeling. I have money, but not tons, and I really love to buy things. It scares me that I might have to refrain in the future, and as Greg said last night, "not buy clothes for a whole two months because we don't have the money." WOW! I know I can totally get the discipline to do it, but that would be challenging for me, I have to admit.

But, I am incredibly grateful for the gift of being able to take pictures. I literally can't stop smiling when I capture something beautiful, or when someone tells me I did a good job. I want to create artwork for people's walls. I really want to capture the moment in a photograph so that you feel like you are right there when looking at it. I want to bring people as much joy as I get when I find an amazing photography blog! With this new camera I have, my images are dramatically prettier and higher quality. I really desire to learn how to properly use it. My dream would be to go fully manual, in the mean time I will ease myself off auto. One day I will get there, I am just going to keep striving for the best that I can.

I felt that I wanted to share something more personal today, maybe its that joyful emotion bubbling over.

And here is a picture that I just love to look at. If you can't tell, I LOVE dogs! Meet Sammy Dykstra....

And an oldie, but a goodie! One of my favorites that I've never shared :)


Anonymous said...

My comment Joanna is that it is an bubbly and emotional season as well as we celebrate Christmas ~ the birth of our Savior. When I think of God's Son being spit upon, degraded, treated as man despised, I'm deeply emotional that One - The Triune God would give His gift of His son for me a Sinner saved by Grace.
Grace, Mercy and Peace be given to you - by the giver of all good and perfect gift! Grams B

Joanna said...

wow, what a great reflection, that IS something to be deeply emotional about! Thank you for sharing that

Anonymous said...

Ps: 94:14 "The Lord's portion is His people" a promise,,,,we're under the everlasting arms!
Luke l:46 " Mary sang, "My soul rejoices in God my Savior"
JOY,JOY,JOY, Praise to the Lord in Heaven above....words from a choir number Greg has sung with choir/s, before.
There is emotion in snow too, see how WHITE it is? Tho our sins be as scarlet they shall be as white as Snow!
Have a very blessed day as you prepare for Christmas and also prepare your mind for exams.
Thinking and praying for you. Grams B.